An important manipulative technique is the planting of hopes and expectations. Here the aim is to influence an individual’s decisions and behavior through hints and suggestions about certain positives, under specific conditions. These hints and suggestions are usually highly veiled and indirect. They may not even be verbal at all, but expressed through attitude, body language, gestures, and similar signals.

A clear example of this technique can be seen in the accommodating behavior of a woman toward a man she finds attractive when she expects some favor from him. She promises him nothing explicitly, but through her behavior, choice of words, tone of voice, body language, and so on, she hints that the man may receive what he wants if he does what she wants from him. In this situation, the man receives additional motivation to do something he might otherwise not have done. In the end, he receives nothing except perhaps the warmest thanks. Thus, his decision-making process has been influenced by expectations, without the woman having taken on any concrete commitment.

Naturally, this technique is not limited to relationships between the sexes. A boss, for example, might manipulate subordinates in a similar way by hinting at a promotion, without mentioning anything specific. Through skillful use of language, they can create certain expectations without actually saying anything concrete on the subject. After all, they cannot be held responsible for how others interpret their words. A politician can do the same by hinting at a better life for voters, without mentioning any concrete measures they intend to take.

This technique can also be used for long-term, ongoing influence. If an individual begins to behave as expected of them, hoping for some compensation or reward for their efforts, they will find it harder to abandon these “investments” by stopping the behavior and admitting—even to themselves—that they have been led on, even when there are objective signals pointing to this. It is more likely that they will continue this losing behavior until something happens that pulls them out of this state. This is similar to what happens with stock traders or gamblers in certain losing situations, when they refuse to accept the loss and instead fall into the psychological trap of hope.

Expectations can also be negative. These are implicit threats. For example, if someone wants—or does not want—another person to make a certain decision, they may simply murmur with a concerned look (or write):

“What a person does to themselves, no one else can do to them…”

“You know best…”

“Everyone bears the consequences…”

“Everyone pays the price for their actions sooner or later…”

“Everything is remembered…”

Such phrases say almost nothing explicitly, yet they plant powerful expectations—of reward or punishment—that can decisively influence behavior without any direct pressure or clear responsibility on the part of the manipulator.